Tag Archives: Money

A Christmas Carol: Lessons in Finance, Business, and Life

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Have a heart that never hardens, and a temper that never tires, and a touch that never hurts. – Charles Dickens

A Christmas Carol has to be one of the most beloved Christmas tales of all time. It was written as a novella by Charles Dickens in 1843. Although, the story is over 170 years old, there are many lessons of wisdom imparted within this story that still has relevance today.

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It never gets old watching Ebenezer Scrooge’s redemption at the hands of three ghosts and the spirit of his late business partner Jacob Marley.

A compelling story indeed.

It is set during the Victorian era of the 1800’s in England. Around 1860.

The story gave us the words and phrases Scrooge, Bah Humbug, and Merry Christmas.

In the 1940’s, Disney even created their own character in his image named Scrooge McDuck.

How did Scrooge go from an innocent young pupil to a crotchety miser?

One word: Life.

We all must go through it, but how we handle life’s ups and down is what really makes us who we are.

Scrooge hated people. However, those around him still chose to show him kindness.

I have learned that you cannot answer hate with anger. You can only show people who you are by how you live your life.

Remembering his story always reminds me to treat others the way I would want to be treated, and that is with dignity and respect.

WHO IS EBENEZER SCROOGE?

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Ebenezer Scrooge is the protagonist of this tale. A miserly business owner who is a skinflint to the core. Though successful in business, he is angry and alone.

His only family is a single nephew from his late and only sister.

As a young boy, he spent all his time on his studies. His father was a very strict and harsh man. There was little time for play or fun for Ebenezer. It hardened his heart. Money was the answer that will give him meaning to his life.

He decided to close himself off to others so that he wouldn’t get hurt. But the thing is, when you open up to people, you let the good in with the bad. This adapted defense mechanism had a profoundly negative effect on adult Scrooge. He learned to place the pursuit of money above love.

He was later employed by a man named Fezziwig, who was kind and gentle. His employer was in the shipping business that was established in 1766.

Although, Scrooge had examples of charitable people and love around him, somehow he let greed take over his heart.

LOVE AND HAPPINESS ARE NOT ONE AND THE SAME

We need never be ashamed of our tears. – Charles Dickens

Money does not buy happiness only temporary satisfaction. It cannot buy friends, family, faith, loyalty, or love. Money is empty. People is what fills you up inside and your heart. Don’t let money control you like it did Scrooge. Money doesn’t control you, you control it.

The absolute saddest and most touching part of the story is when his betrothed has some very harsh words for Ebenezer.

At a young age, he made a promise to marry a girl of no fortune.

Over time he changes. He becomes cold and harsh. She tells him that one by one she has watched his nobler aspirations fall away.

His master passion of gain is now his only love. An Idol has displaced and replaced her in his heart. A golden one. He only cares now for gold. Money.

She asked him if he was a free man would he still want to marry a dowerless or penniless girl with nothing but myself to bring to a marriage. He stays silent. She has her answer.

In one of the absolute most heart wrenching and saddest rebuffs I have ever heard a woman say to a man, it almost brings tears to my eyes.

She tells Scrooge this; thus, ending their engagement:

Ebenezer, I release you;

You are a free man;

I let you go with a full heart;

May you be happier in the life you have chosen.

Her rejection of him was the final straw as he was never the same. He calls himself a fool for not going after her. I think it was his pride that let love slip away.

It seems that old fools used to be young fools.

This film version of he speech in 1984, in my opinion, is the best version I have heard. It makes me stop in my tracks every time to hear her say it just sends a sharp chill down my spine its so cold and sad.

A Christmas Carol (1984)

This is my favorite version of the many film adaptions. I remember seeing it on reruns growing up during the holidays.

Scrooge (1970) Starring Albert Finney

The 1951 version also has fine acting and strong dialogue including its delivery. The scene where the engagement ends is particularly well-spoken by the films star.

He says, “the world can be so brutally cruel to the poor. All the while professing to condemn the pursuit of wealth in the same breath.”

He asked his soon to be ex-fiance, “is it a terrible thing for a man to struggle to be something better than he is?”

She feels that is is if a man weighs everything only by gain.

A Christmas Carol (1951)

A CHANCE TO GLIMPSE THE PAST, PRESENT, AND FUTURE

A loving heart is the truest wisdom. – Charles Dickens

In the story he is visited by the spirits of Christmases Past, Present and Future.

He gets to relive the mistakes of the past and present and see what will come to pass in the future, if he doesn’t change his ways.

As hindsight is always 20/20, who wouldn’t like a chance to change right what once went wrong.

However, Scrooge was a tightwad. Ridiculously cheap and stingy. He ate a bowl of gruel for Christmas dinner in a room with one lit candle. Pathetic.

He didn’t even spend for his own comfort. So, he was miserable and made everyone around him the same. People like him only see the cost of visiting the eye doctor, not the benefits that could come with 20/20 vision.

From his story we learn this, you may not be able to change the past, but the future is not written yet. You can write the last few pages, if you have the courage to change. It is NEVER too late to change for the better.

THEY SAY CHARITY STARTS AT HOME

No one is useless in this world who lightens the burdens of another. – Charles Dickens

Your actions do impact others. For every cause there is an effect. Every action you take affects not only you, but the people around you and someone else in the long run. There is a reaction for every action.

When asked to give to charity, he asks, “Are there no prisons?” and “Are there no workhouses?” Then goes on to state that it would be better to decrease the “surplus population” than to help the needy.

Oh yea. He’s a real charmer.

Scrooge had a loyal and faithful employee named Cratchit. It was a shame he treated him so badly. He wouldn’t even allow the man to put more coal on the fire to keep warm while at work.

It was too bad he could not show the same kindness upon Bob Cratchit that his former employer did upon him. It would have been a great way to pay it forward. And to honor those that came before him.

They say when you want to be charitable, you do not have to look far. You can start at home. Why not start with your friends?

LEARN FROM THE MISTAKES OF THE PAST AND OTHERS

A sad sight to see was his old deceased business partner. Jacob Marley, who is in purgatory for his sins. As punishment, forced to walk the earth in chains while seeing those he could have helped but didn’t and now being unable to do so. He tells Scrooge to change before it is too late.

Jacob says, “The common welfare should have been my business.” Helping people should have been more important than money.

I cannot tell you how many times I have watched others that are older than myself and said I do not want to make the same mistakes. I made different plans for my life and charted a different path.

When I get a chance to repay a kindness, I do it. Unlike Scrooge, it is rare in this life that you get a second chance. I try to do a good job the first time. Tell people the truth. Help them. Reach back and pull someone else up. They say you never get a second chance to make a first impression. A true statement indeed.

I read history to see what has been done in the past to avoid making those same mistakes in the future.

No regrets.

Most people’s number one regret on their deathbed is that they focused too much on work and money and not enough on their relationships. Please don’t be one of those people.

The best and biggest change in Scrooge after his ghostly visits is his generosity. The spirit of Christmas Yet to Come foretold of a bad future. He saw a life of sadness and loneliness and that his deeds directed his future of misery. He says he will remember what the spirits tell him and says, “I will not shut out the lessons that they teach!” Scrooge heeded the spirits words and mended his ways.

HAVE A FINANCIAL PLAN

Scrooge was the extreme version of frugality. He saved more than necessary and gave little. Scrooge hoarded every penny. His plan was to have as much money as possible, but that is only one piece of the puzzle. He planned for his money, but not his life. Life is complex. It requires money, yes, but also people because life is about building relationships.

Get a good education, then keep your head down and work. But don’t forget about developing your friendships and relationships.

The Cratchits were poor. Living off a miserable 15 shillings a week. They had a roof, food, and clothes, but no luxuries. They made use of everything they had. No wasteful spending. And were grateful for what they had: each other.

I try to only do what I’m passionate about. Will it get me closer to my goals? If not, I tend to not spend any money and instead find a way to economize. I spend on what is important, what I value, and what I need.

FORGIVENESS

To err is human, to forgive divine. – Alexander Pope

At the end of the story, Scrooge pledges a vow by saying, “I will honor Christmas in my heart, and try to keep it all the year.” A wonderful promise to make and keep indeed.

Do not ever be afraid or ashamed to ask for forgiveness. It is a sign of strength and growing maturity.

Dickens once said, “No space of regret can make amends for one life’s opportunity misused.” I believe that people should do what they are good at, cultivate their gifts, and help people with that gift. Use your gifts to solve problems creatively. And not just once a year, but all the days of the year.

So, in the words of Dickens, Merry Christmas!

And Happy Holidays from Greenbacks Magnet

Money tips from Anya of Buffy the Vampire Slayer

“I’m just so excited. They come in, I help them, they give us money in exchange for goods, you give me money for working for you. I have a place in the world now. I’m part of the system. I’m a workin’ gal.” – Anya (Season Five).

If you ever watched the show Buffy the Vampire Slayer, then you must have noticed Anya and her fixation on money.  You probably also noticed she changed her hair style… A LOT.

The show ran for seven seasons and was created by Joss Whedon.

The self-proclaimed Scooby Gang 

It started in the nineties and ended in 2003. It starred Sarah Michelle Gellar as the titular character, Buffy Summers. In my opinion, the first four seasons were on fire. The fourth was the absolute best one, to me. This is the only television show I have ever seen where when I finished watching one particular episode; I clapped. It was just that good.

Actress Emma Caulfield played Anya. In this reunion photo of the cast from 2008, she is the one  in the middle wearing the black hat.

ANYA’S BACKGROUND

Other Aliases: Anyanka, Anya Christina Emmanuella Jenkins, “The Patron Saint of Women Scorned,” Aud ; note that some sources refer to her as “Anya Emerson,” but that has not been confirmed in the show.

Birthdate: July 4th

Age: 1120

Anya: “What a day. Give me a beer.”
Bartender: “I.D.”
Anya: (glares)
Bartender: “I.D.”
Anya: “I’m 1120 years old, just give me a frigging beer!”
Bartender: “I.D.”
Anya: (sighs) “Give me a Coke.”

Year of birth: Unknown?? Around 880 AD

Marital Status: Single, formerly Engaged.

Known Relatives: Olaf (ex-husband), Alexander Harris (ex-fiancée).

Here is a short introduction to the comic stylings of Anya

Before we go any further on Anya and her love of capitalism, you should know she did not start on the show’s first season. She came along in season 3. In an episode titled, “The Wish.”

Below you will find out more about Anya and her love of money.

But first…

The star of the show. Buffy Summers.

This is, as the say in the film John Wick, a tasting of Buffy and what she does.

She’s awesome right.

Now, back to Anya.

One thing I could not get over was whenever Anya’s lips were moving, it was in your face truthfulness. Not the norm. Especially, her fascination with money.

What made her so funny was her greedy, materialistic, money hungry, capitalism-loving ways.

While Anya may have lacked tact, she had a way with words that really hit home. She was ridiculously straight-forward and honest. In some ways it was refreshing, but in others it was downright rude.

However, love it or hate it, she would tell people like it was. Anya was blunt. She kept it💯.

She had lots of witticisms.

Here we go.

WORK FOR THE MONEY, HONEY

Anya: “Thank you for coming. We value your patronage. Please come again for more purchases!”
Giles: “Could we perhaps be a little less effusive, Anya? We don’t want to frighten the people.”
Anya: “I’m just so excited. They come in, I help them, they give us money in exchange for goods, you give me money for working for you. I have a place in the world now. I’m part of the system. I’m a workin’ gal.”
Giles: “Yes. Well, why don’t you start organizing the shipping orders?”
Anya: “Oh, no, that’s boring. I just want to do the money parts.”

She tells it like it is. Anya never shied away from making a bold statement. She always said what she wanted. I have learned to do the same, but tactfully.

ANYA ON CUSTOMER SERVICE 

“Anyathe Shopkeepers‘ Union of America called. They want me to tell you that “Please go away” just got replaced with “Have a nice day.” – Xander

Anya says to customers, “Please go.” And Xander tells her the correct way to talk to patrons.

She then proceeds to yell at the next customer in a harsh, sarcastic tone, “Hey, you! Have a nice day.

Just a thought, it is nice to be courteous and pleasant if you want people’s patronage. Maybe, like this, but a little toned down.

They want me to tell you that "Please go" just got replaced with "Have a nice day".

https://www.tumblr.com/awbuckyno/78124077317

Anya: “Please go.”
Xander: “Anya, the Shopkeepers Union of America called. They want me to tell you that ‘Please go’ just got replaced with ‘Have a nice day.'”
Anya: “But I have their money. Who cares what kind of day they have?”

She is also very protective of the money and the cash register.

“Ring up sales? With the money? She gets to fondle the money? Customer! Hello, customer! How may I serve you?”

SLAY FOR MONEY

At one point, when Buffy was hard up for money, Anya suggested they she start charging for her vampire slaying. A vengeance for cash. A slayer for hire.

While it was good for a laugh on the show, her thinking was flawed, but accurate. If you are good at something and going to do it anyway, why not get paid for it.

ANYA ON CELEBRATING EARNING AND MAKING MONEY

“All I can say is, I hope we make as much tomorrow.”

She took pleasure in the little things.

Dance of Capitalist Superiority. Episode 6. Season 6: All the Way. Original Airdate October 30, 2001.

https://www.tumblr.com/sarahwalker/91328105006

See the video here.

I like to celebrate my wins and accomplishments too. They may not involve money dancing, but I like to recognize a job well-done.

Money is just a tool. It’s how we keep score. Money is the scorecard. That’s all.

I don’t have to celebrate with a $300 purse or bottle of champagne. I am just fine with a $15 bottle of wine. And investing the $285 difference in my Roth IRA. Specifically, in a 500 index fund.

ANYA’S MATERIALISTIC WAYS 

Willow: “It stole Giles’ car.”
Xander: “Why would a demon steal a car?”
Anya: “Why would a demon steal THAT car?”

ANYA ON CHILD LABOR 

Giles: “Then useful you shall be! We can always use a hand.”
Anya: “But you have a hand. A paid hand. A hand that isn’t the hand of the illegal child labor.”
Giles: “Anya…”
Anya: “But of course it’s wonderful that you find doing my job so distracting! I am unthreatened. Proceed.”

Well, at least she recognizes that it’s illegal.

ANYA ON THE VALUE OF HER TIME

She learned really quick that time is money and did not want to use up her precious energy doing anything that was unrelated to the accumulation of more money. Pretty shallow and self-absorbed, I know.

I value my time as well. I don’t try to do anything that doesn’t excite me. Except when it comes to helping others.

https://www.tumblr.com/jcap/113595460342

SHE GIVES NO F#*K$

https://www.tumblr.com/sunnydale-scoobies/99436418771

ON VALUING HERSELF

Giles: “Essentially, their agenda is the same as ours. They want to save the world and kill demons.”
Anya: “Kill the CURRENT demons, right? CURRENT demons.”

This was funny because Anya is an ex-demon on the show.

ON VALUING HER MONEY 

Anya: “Spike! What are you doing? You made me yell really high!”
Spike: “Hey, yeah, I did. I scared you. Gimme money.”
Anya: “I’m not paying you for scaring me.”
Spike: “You’re not paying me. I’m robbing you.”
Anya: “Oh, well, that’s just ludicrous. You can’t hurt me because you’ve got that chip in your brain. Also, I like my money the way it is… when it’s mine.”

ANYA ON VALUING XANDER’S TIME

She loved her some Xander. But not at first.

http://watcherspet.tumblr.com/post/88524073528

I thought they were great together. He really changed once he had her in his life. She recognized his value too.

Anya: “And after everything you’ve been through with Angel. You really should get yourself a boring boyfriend. Like Xander!”

Anya: “You can’t have Xander.”

LETTING XANDER KNOW SHE VALUES HIM

Anya: “Xander, you haven’t been paying any attention to me tonight. Just peddling those processed food bricks. I don’t know why.”
Xander: “Well, let me put it in a way you’ll understand. Sell bars, make money, take Anya nice places, buy pretty things.”
Anya: “That does make sense. All right, I support you. Go sell more.”

ANYA AND THE GAME OF LIFE

When Anya finds out her love of money is hilarious. In the Season 5 episode, “the real me”. Xander and Anya are babysitting Dawn and they are playing the game of Life when Anya figures it all out:

ANYA ON VALUING CHILDREN
We believe the children are our future

“Can I trade in the children for more cash? ”

https://www.tumblr.com/chylerleigh/91487927405

When playing the game of Life, she noticed she was burdened with a husband and children and tons of cash.

Once she learned that money was good, she gleefully delighted in saying she wanted more cash.

Anya: “Crap! Look at this–now I’m burdened with a husband and several tiny pink children, and more cash than I can reasonably manage.”
Xander: “That means you’re winning.”
Anya: “Really?”
Xander: “Yes, cash equals good.”
Anya: “Ooh! I’m so pleased. Can I trade in the children for more cash?”

Check it out here.

While it may have been cold and callous to want to give up the fake kids for cash, she did have a valid point in understanding that a having a family requires money and are a heavy load to bear. So, you better prepare for them.

ANYA ON CAPITALISM 

Anya: “I’ve recently come to realize that there is more to me than just being human. I’m also an American.”
Giles: “Yes, I suppose you are, in a manner of speaking. I mean, you were born here — your mortal self.”
Anya: (to Giles whose from England she says in a harsh tone) “Well that’s right, foreigner!” (to Willow & Xander in a softer tone) “So I’ve been reading a lot about the Good ‘Ol Us of A, embracing the extraordinarily precious ideology that has helped to shape and define it.”
Willow: “Democracy?”
Anya: “Capitalism!”

HOW SHE FEELS ABOUT MONEY

That one time when Buffy asked how was Anya’s money and her  reaction of pure joy. Like, one of the Scoobies finally gets her.

Look, I like money fine, but not as much as Anya.

I prefer people over things.

Anya was downright humdrum when it came to talking about money. Although, she was funny, at times she just lacked sympathy and empathy for the plight of others.

However, in the end, she chose to fight beside the Scoobies. So, people really did matter more than money. That is something we should all remember.

Gene Simmons On Power

“Walk amongst the natives by day, but in your heart be Superman.” ― Gene Simmons

In 2017, Gene Simmons wrote a book called, On Power: My Journey Through the Corridors of Power and How You Can Get More Power.

This book was nothing like I expected.

It was MORE.

Like the title says, it’s about getting more power. Become more powerful than you ever thought you could be. It all starts with your actions.

Let’s get right into it.

WHO IS GENE SIMMONS?

Image: Forbes.com

The short version is that he is a co-founder and front-man of the band KISS, that he helped start in the 1970’s. They are America’s #1 gold record-award-winning group of all time.

Image: New York Post

Gene grew up dirt poor. He practiced guitar for hours after watching The Beatles on an appearance of the Ed Sullivan show, he knew then that he wanted to be a rock star.

According to Harper Collins, the book was inspired by Niccolo Machiavelli’s The Prince, Simmons offers his unique take on the dynamics of power in every realm of life, from the bedroom to the boardroom, to the world of rock, celebrity, and social media, to politics. With one-of-a-kind anecdotes from his life and career, as well as stories from historical and contemporary masters of power, including Winston Churchill, Napoleon Bonaparte, Warren Buffett, Michael Jordan, Oprah, and Elon Musk, Simmons crafts a persuasive and provocative theory on how the pursuit of power drives civilization and defines our lives.

Gene Simmons has an estimated net worth of over $50 million dollars. So, I decided to give the book a quick read. Glad I did.

POWER IS WHAT EVERYONE WANTS

People want power.

  • Power over their lives
  • Power over their time
  • Power over their professional lives and career
  • Power over their money

So, how do you get this so-called power.

It’s a power grab for sure.

Gene takes a no-holds-barred approach to his life and on power. It’s dog eat dog out there. You have to be one of the big dogs.

Gene believed that everyone deserves power and that it is yours for the taking.

In his book, he gives you the key to unlock the doors to the temple of power.

GENE ON EDUCATION

“It’s up to you to educate yourself.”

“It’s up to you to learn speaking skills and people skills.”

“It’s up to you to try (and usually fail, but to try again) all sorts of ventures.”

“Believe me, the library is the temple of God. Education is the most sacred religion of all.” 

He graduated from Richmond College in New York City getting a bachelor’s degree in education. At one point, he was a school teacher in the Upper West Side.

Gene also speaks multiple languages such as German and Hebrew.

I noticed this was also a theme of Scrooge McDuck. Get a good education, become a linguist, and get to work.

I read everything I can get my little hands on. I go to the library every month. I regularly check out 4-5 books at a time. Sometimes more. I do believe in being well-read.

GENE ON SUCCESS

The rest is a combination of hard work, being at the right place …at the right time…with the right thing…oh yes…and more (never ending) hard work.” 

You want success? Well, you have to work for it.

Gene puts his money where his mouth is.

He worked for a butcher hauling up huge slabs of meat and cleaning the blood off the butcher block. Gene has worked as a typist and sold fruit on the side of the road when he was 8 years old.

Make no mistake. Gene is a hard worker and a hustler. He was working multiple jobs to get ahead. Similar to Jay Leno.

As for myself, at one point, I was working as a waitress, cashier, or in sales. In addition, to going to college and studying at times up to 5-7 hours a day! Going to bed at 1 am and getting up at 6 am. Rinse and repeat! I did that for years.

GENE ON ENTREPRENEURSHIP AND CAPITALISM

“Before I ever knew what the word Entrepreneur was, I realized in America and in the Western part of the world in general, you are given the opportunity to be whatever you want to be. And that is all anyone should ever expect from the Capitalist system. The rest is up to you.”

Yep. America is the land of YOYO (You’re on your own).

You learn real quick that no one is coming to save you. You have to create your own safety net. You can’t depend on the government. The only person to depend and rely on is self. Get it? Got it? Good.

GENE ON MONEY

“So much of our popular mythology focuses on the negative aspects of power that we forget that gaining power is, perhaps, the only way to enable ourselves to make a difference in our lives and in the lives of others.”

Gene says you must first get your financial house in order before you can espouse love.

This is similar to what I once heard Tyra Banks mother say, “you have to get yourself together first, before you can help anybody else.”

You should always be looking for ways to earn and expand those earnings. KISS started out with nothing. They slowly built a following. IT. TOOK. YEARS. They were riding around in an old van going from gig to gig and living off hot dogs.

But KISS got smart. They started licensing their name. Everything from lunchboxes to t-shirts. Their moniker is big. Multi-million dollar deals got them to the top of the heap. Monetize everything is Gene’s motto. And he has. And it’s been lucrative to say the least.

So, there you have it. Gene Simmons on power. If you want it bad enough, you just have to work and rock-n-roll all night, like KISS, to get it.

3 Money Lessons from Til Debt Do Us Part

“Money isn’t rocket science.” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade

Til Debt Do Us Part is a Canadian television series that follows couples that are going through financial crisis and financial expert, Gail Vaz-Oxlade, comes in to help the couple find solutions.

The series ran for over 100 episodes from 2005-2011. It also had a spin-off called Princess.   She teaches couples to go from red to black and gain control over their money.

The show would air right after the Suze Orman show during its run on CNBC. Read my post Dom Perignon Taste on a Budweiser Budget to see how it all went down on Suze’s show.

#1 REASON COUPLES BREAK UP

Money is the number #1 reason couples break up. She visits couples weekly and gives them challenges to help with their finances. Then at the end of each episode, after about 4 weeks, she awards the couple with up to $5,000 dollars to help them get out of debt.

CUT THE CHEQUE

By far the best part of the show, in my opinion, is when at the end of one month, Gail Vaz-Oxlade gives the couple a cheque for an amount up to $5,000, depending on their attitudes and how well they did during the challenges. Keep in mind, couples could get less and some have. One of the lowest amounts I have seen her give was $3,000, which is a 40% reduction of the prize money.

The show was so popular that a 52-Week Life Planner was released based on the television series and offers day-by-day, step-by-step strategies and tips for successfully managing household finances.

This reminds me of a Tom Holland interview he did for Spiderman talking about how Anthony Mackie always says, “cut the check.”

https://twitter.com/UNILADFilm/status/886949865330155521

Let’s get back to Gail.

If you have never heard of the show Til Debt or can’t remember it, no worries, I will take you back down memory lane tonight.

WHO IS GAIL VAZ-OXLADE?

“We feel good when our homes are bright and shiny, put a little elbow grease into your money and it’ll glisten too.” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade

Gail Vaz-Oxlade is a financial writer and was a columnist for numerous publications as a freelancer including Yahoo! Canada Finance.  She has helped people from high finance to low-income solve their money problems. Eventually, she became a television personality due to all of her work in finance and that is how the show Til Debt came into existence with her as the host.

She has written numerous books on the topic of finance. I have actually read one of her books called Debt-Free Forever.

Gail has a no-nonsense attitude when it comes to money. And that is what makes her so good at what she does.

FOR THE LOVE OF JARS

“You can have everything you want. All you need is a plan. And how do we spell plan? B-U-D-G-E-T!” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade

Watching the show was very interesting. One recurring theme was the jars. Gail advocated for couples to live on cash.

Every single episode, you got cash jars. You would put in a certain dollar amount. When you spend, you write it down in the budget binder cause cash slips through our fingers easier than that snail did with Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.

Some couples were taking out cash at the ATM from their bank accounts or doing cash advances, which Gail said she could not track so we don’t know where the money went. When it’s gone, it’s gone. Without writing it down or keeping receipts, there is no other way to track cash. So, jars it is.

MONEY LESSONS FOR GAIL

Gai loves cash and hates banks. She thinks they are bleeding people dry slowly with their interest and fees. Gail says banks are wolves in sheep’s clothing. The only way this will change is to teach financial literacy in school. I say start in elementary when they are old enough to start asking for a $1 lollipop, it’s time to start the finance lessons.

Check out my posts on banking.

Banking at Credit Unions versus Banks – The Great Debate

New Banking Rules: Clear a check payment in a day

Q&A with Lisa Servon:, Author of the Unbanking of America

This is the secret recipe to building wealth: You need to make more money and you need to spend less money.

Here are 3 lessons that Gail taught me: (1) both partners need to manage the money, (2) no retail therapy, and (3) debt repayment takes time.

LESSON ONE: GAIL ON COUPLES MANAGING MONEY

  1. Do not have only one partner manage the finances.

“It’s not unusual for one person to assume the nitty-gritty of daily finances…. The problem is that when one person is excluded, or totally abdicates responsibility, it means the other can mess things up with no monitoring or grow resentful at always having to do the detail…. Taking turns managing the chequebook, and having regular conversations so that both of you are clear about what’s going on, means you’re both in the know and working to the same ends. It also means that one person doesn’t have to deal with all the crap, while the other merrily laughs off the stress and frustration with, ‘You’re managing the money, so this is your problem to deal with.’ (Yes, there are dopes who say this.)”

Always know what is happening with your money. I don’t care who signs the check and put it in the envelope. Just make sure you lick the stamp. Be involved. Ask questions. Don’t be in the dark.

It’s kind of like that scene in Charmed in the episode Be Careful What You Witch For. Remember that scene in the beginning, after the opening credits. I want you to be skeptical like Phoebe. Always know who you owe and how much. Nothing is for free.

The conversation went like this:

PhoebeI don’t get it you’ve been stuck in that bottle for two hundred years then someone finally sends you to us and you’ve no idea who licked the stamp? I find that very hard to believe.

Genie:What? I don’t get it you win the lotto and you’re asking for explanations?

Piper:Actually we’d like to know who to send the thank you note to.

Same conversation you should have with your partner, but about which creditor.  And winning the lotto, yeah right? Read my posts Forget casinos, bet on yourself and Mega Millions win or bust.

LESSON TWO: GAIL ON RETAIL THERAPY

  1. Forget retail therapy

“Plastic is anesthetic — it dulls the pain, and then what happens is you just keep waiting for the next fake high.”

And don’t I know it. I had a huge shopping problem for years. It was done as a way to dull the pain of the things going on around me – low-income, working full-time, going to college – I was a mess!

I had some pretty terrible managers when I was younger too. All the stress was getting to me. I had to find a way to cope, but shopping was not it. As I got more mature, I found ways to de-stress that were cheaper or free.

I have said it before that credit is seductive and addictive. It should not be used to replace your emergency fund (liquid cash). However, if you do, be strategic and use credit wisely and sparingly.

How to get access to a $250,000 Emergency fund with $0 of your own cash

How Benjamin Franklin used 13 virtues to get rich 

LESSON THREE: GAIL ON DEBT REPAYMENT

“A goal without a deadline is just a dream.” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade

  1. Slow and steady is the way to repay debt.

“One step at a time. You are on your way. Expect challenges. Keep your goal where you can see it.”

You better believe it. If it took you 8 years to accumulate the debt, thinking you can pay it off in 3 months is delusional. See my post Getting out of debt one step at a time.

The good news is that once you recognize you have a problem with debt, then you can work on solutions. I have noticed that generally 2-3 years of cutting back and attacking debt is usually enough time to pay off most if not all of your consumer debt except the mortgage and student loans. After 5-7 years, the only debt left is usually the mortgage. That is a small price to pay for freedom.

TIL DEBT O US PART

I did a search online and found this synopsis of the show’s premise at IMDB.com. It’s spot on.

Storyline

Money can’t buy you love. But keeping love alive without money can be pretty tough. In fact, ninety percent of marriage breakups are due to money problems. And to get advice on how to manage money usually costs money! Til Debt Do Us Part, is a series that offers tough-love solutions to those willing to face their financial troubles head on. In each episode we meet a couple in crisis. Some are on the verge of bankruptcy, hounded by creditors or facing eviction. Others are just getting by, but in the midst of a personal meltdown or relationship breakdown because of money issues. With the sensitivity of a therapist and the toughness of a CFO, our host, renowned financial author and columnist, Gail Vaz-Oxlade reveals what she’s found in a couple’s finances – and then she’ll dig a little deeper. She asks some tough questions and then they’ll be forced to face reality. Where will it end if they continue on this rocky road? To get things back on track, Gail takes control of their finances …

This show was very eye-opening in how people managed their finances. Many did not have a clue what was coming in and going out. Gail would come in with her screen shots of the couples bank accounts and spending and give it to them straight.

Many times the wives would burst out in tears after seeing how much debt the family was actually in. Lots of couples were in over their heads. Some so deep in debt they had to consider selling their house, or worse, bankruptcy!

Some couples did not want to make any changes. Even though they were debt up to their eyeballs. These people needed to get their priorities straight. Much like Hermione, in Harry Potter.

Here is the show’s Intro and theme song along with a promo. This is just a taste, a light sampling, of what you are in store for with this show.

There are 2 episodes that stand out for me. They were called The Worst Family Ever and Love Affair with Luxury.

MONEY WORRIES CAN CAUSE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS

In the S03E13 entitled, “The worst family ever?” One couple were living in the wife’s family basement for about a couple of years. They spent with reckless abandon. Oh, the couple popped bottles night and day. Especially, after moving out and buying their own home for about $225,000. That’s not bad. What is bad is that they saved zero dollars while sponging off her parents.

That’s right. While mooching off the rents’ they saved $0. Not one dime. Even Scrooge McDuck saved his number one dime. See my post Money Lessons I Learned from Scrooge McDuck. Also, check out Why the Rents’ shouldn’t pay your rent.

Then, to make matters worse, they threw non-stop parties at their house for friends and family. This was obviously all to make themselves look good to friends and family. In Yoda speak, so concerned with appearances they are.

“Happy people don’t worry about what other people think about them.” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade

OUT OF CONTROL SHOPPING FOR BABY BUT THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT

In addition, they expanded their family and had a son, but financially were unprepared for this. At one point, the wife was spending $1200 a month outfitting junior! I couldn’t believe it. What is she buying Versace onesies? Get real. A baby doesn’t care. They just want to be warm, feed, and dry.

This couple were overspending by the tune of $4,100 a month! Holy spending gone bonkers, Batman!

Fun Fact: For those of you unfamiliar with that Batman line, here is where it comes from. The Batman television series from the 1960’s. Batman was American live action television series, based on the DC comic book. It starred Adam West as the titular character and hero Batman and Burt Ward as his sidekick Robin.

It was also turned into a cartoon series. Here is Robin at his finest with his sayings. Hilarious!

I decided to post it so you won’t ever have to get the tongue lashing that Penny got from Sheldon on an episode of The Big Bang Theory about Batman at 2:48 into the video.

The Precious Fragmentation – Season 3, Episode 17
Aired March 8, 2010. One of my favorite episodes.

https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x6ng6kb

It was about The Lord of the Rings. Even Raj used a Holy Robin saying in there!

In this next video, Sheldon gives a fun fact to Raj. Now, you know where I get it from.

Now, back to the story.

The way the couple on the show  were able to overspend like that, drumroll please…the credit cards!

When Gail comes along they are so bad she tells them they have to sell the house. They flat out said they could not sell the house. Even though they are on the path to $1.3 million in debt and possible bankruptcy! Gail, at one point in the show, tells them they are the worst couple she has had on the show and that she had a few sleepless nights worrying about how to help them out of this situation. Coming from Gail, that’s scary.

The way it went down, it reminded me of that scene in The Chipmunk Adventure, when Jeanette and Eleanor was telling the Arabian prince that Brittany spends money like a drunken sailor and Brittany got mad. Hilarious. I just so happened to find the footage of that particular scene and the movie on YouTube. Hope you have fun watching! No need to thank me.  Like Dean Winchester says, “You’re Welcome.”

SHOULD YOU FINANCE A $100,000 CAR?

“Change brings challenges, learning, and a sense of New. Change is full of promise.”- Gail Vaz-Oxlade

In the S04E03 entitled, “Love Affair with Luxury,” which aired March 6, 2008, is the gold standard of delusions of grandeur when it comes to money management. The wife, Simone, is a champion shopper and a spendthrift who manages to make 53 shopping trips in a single month! That’s nuts. Even though she’s on maternity leave, a luxury car is next on her shopping list.

The only reason the couple is able to afford such luxuries is because they have each other’s incomes. The minute one person’s income is gone or reduced, i.e. disability or divorce, the whole house of cards comes tumbling down faster than the stock market has in the last 30 days.

Check out this post by BudgetsareSexy to see just how far down the stock market has gone in his The Red Wedding of Net Worth Reports.

LOVE AFFAIR WITH LUXURY SUMMARIZED

I found the plot summary for the episode Love Affair with Luxury online at IMDB.com.

Frank and Simone’s combined $110,000 annual income is currently curbed by Simone being on maternity leave. Simone is addicted to what she believes she needs to keep up appearances in every respect, which includes working out at the gym, and spending money on “stuff” for herself, such as clothes, getting beauty treatments of various kinds, and having a beautifully appointed house. A $125,000 new car is next on the list. Simone, however, states that she would never do anything that would place her family at risk. But Frank doesn’t realize he is just as guilty, spending money on his electronics, which includes six large television sets in their house of four people, including one infant. This spending has resulted in $55,000 in consumer debt so far. They constantly fight about money, something having to give if their marriage can overcome this issue. As such, Gail issues them challenges largely focusing on dealing with their root problem, namely their addiction to luxury, this focus which not only entails them doing the challenges, but understanding why she has issued these challenges.

At one point in the show she says, “we can finance $100,000 can’t we.” For a car no less! If you have ever read this blog, you know I can’t stand cars for the simple reason that they can keep you in debt forever. You could spend a couple hundred grand on cars in a lifetime. You know how much interest you could earn on $200,000! Here are just a few on my posts on my beef with car loans below.

If you want to be wealthy, drive a Ford 

Why not to own a $50,000 car on a $25,000 salary 

Life is good without a car payment 

A car and nothing more

Outrageous Loan Terms for Porsche that even the Rich can’t justify 

FINAL THOUGHTS

Money is a tool we use in the present to create the reality we want in the future. Learning about finance is a good start. Practicing good money habits and teaching your kids to understand the concepts of money – budgeting, saving, and spending – you help create their reality.

So, I want to always stay in control of your…I will now end this post in the last words of the Til Debt Do Us Part theme song, money, money, money, money, money, money, moneyyyy!

Become your own bank

“If you would be wealthy, think of saving as well as getting.” —Benjamin Franklin

Growing up one of my favorite toys was my piggybank.

I used to put all the spare change and money I found or received into it.

It was my ice cream truck money.

I just loved having my own.

It was such as source of pride, freedom, and independence because I was allowed to spend my money on the things I wanted.

That is how I want everyone to feel.

A sense of ownership and accountability over oneself and your actions.

In order to do this, you have to go back to saving the old-fashioned way, like putting money inside that old piggybank.

Here’s how.

A HOUSE IS NOT A PIGGYBANK

First, you need to stay away from borrowing. And if you truly must borrow, make sure to only get what is absolutely necessary. Every dollar you borrow just keeps you in debt.

Case in point, if you do a cash out refinance on your home, that can reset your mortgage debt-free clock and cause you to owe more interest over the life of the loan.

No one wants that.

You need to keep your hands off of large piles of cash. This includes the equity in your home, your 401(k), and easy access savings accounts.

It’s like losing weight. You have to keep your hands out of the cookie jar. In this instance, it’s the money jar. If you keep taking out of it, you will never reach your goals.

Forget taking out huge auto loans and personal loans. You do not need to drive a BMW to the airport on the way to Jamaica. That is the road to broke, if you cannot afford it.

I would rather you drive a Honda to the Grand Canyon, if this will keep you out of debt.

HOW TO START SAVING YOUR COINS

The most important step is to decide to save. If you want to save more, you have to earn more, slash expenses, or both.

Set a goal.

I started out with a goal of $50 per month and worked my way up to saving $13,000 a year by increasing yearly savings goals.

You have to write it down. Otherwise, it is a wish and not a goal. A goal requires action. It starts with writing it down. A written plan is 80% more likely to succeed.

I started saving my change. I would put it into a jar or bag.

I would save up anywhere from $25 to $100 dollars in change and then deposit this into the bank.

When you see the money add up and feel how heavy that coin jar or bag is, it gives you incentive to keep going. After, mastering the coin game, I moved on to bigger gains.

TURN SAVING COINS INTO SAVING DOLLARS

Then I started turning my attention onto dollars.

I started with manually transferring $50 per month into my savings account.

From there, I set up an automatic deposit of $25 every two weeks.

However, I was also getting tired of having to pay ATM fees. So, I found a way around this.

I would have to either go to the bank and take out a large enough amount of money to get me through the week, go to free ATM’s, spend less, or go to stores and do cash back.

For instance, grocery stores will allow you to do a debit card cash back of anywhere from $100-$300 depending on what store you go to.

Other places, like the convenience store, may allow you to get between $20-$80 cash back with a purchase.

I slowly worked my way up to saving more.

Every year, I would re-evaluate what my saving goals were, I would write it down, and figure out a way to make it happen.

If you zero sum budget, then you know when something gets paid off or you eliminate any type of expense that money gets freed up and must go somewhere or it disappears. Like all good dogs, it goes into heaven, I call it dollars heaven.

I started saving my money first from income I earned, and then spending what was left over.

I would decide to save $300 per month and figure out how much more to bring in to increase my cash flow or what I could cut in my budget to lower my expenses and then save that money.

It went down like this:

Year 1: Save $600.

Year 2: Save $1,800.

Year 3: Save $2,500.

Year 4: Save $3,600.

Year 5: Save $10,000.

Year 6: Save $13,333.

WHERE TO PLACE YOUR MONEY

Since, I knew I did not want to depend on having to go to the bank or grocery store every week, I decided to place money into a cash box.

I would put no more than a few hundred bucks in it.

I was placing my savings into several savings accounts such as regular savings and money market savings.

In addition, I would label my savings accounts to ear mark that money for things I wanted to pay for such as a vacation, car, home down payment, or college.

I then started looking into Certificates of Deposit (CDs) and High Yield Savings Accounts (HYSA).

Earn Money with High Yield Savings Accounts

With the high yield accounts, you can start to earn money on your money, that you can spend any way you want.

HOW TO BE YOUR OWN BANKER

Now that you have a cash cushion and cash box, you need banks less and less.

You should get to the point of not needing to borrow for much of anything.

You can keep 1s, 5s, 10s, 20s, 50s, and 100s in your cash box. Enough money to make your own change.

The savings account allows you to earn interest on your money and use this to save up enough to pay for hotel stays, rental cars, and vacations.

You can also earn through peer-to-peer lending because you now have enough dough to start lending to others like a bank does. And earn interest too!

ROLLING IN THE DOUGH

At this point, you should be able to start saving at least 10% to 25% of your income, after you eliminate debt and put your money to work for you.

So, now you know how I did it and what you can do too.

I went from saving $50 to over $13,000 per year! See how here 

How Millennial Money inspired me to start saving $13,333.06 a year

I started doing 5% of my income to now saving over 41% of my gross income!

It took years to get to this point.

Once I made the decision to save, I wrote it down, and created a plan.

It took over 5 years to get here!

So, take my advice, do not rush to try and do so much and then do nothing.

Take small steps toward bigger ones. That is the key to building wealth. The kind of wealth that lasts takes time to build. There are no shortcuts. Only patience, discipline, consistency, and time.

The six ways to get rich

“What’s keeping you from being rich? In most cases, it’s simply a lack of belief. In order to become rich, you must believe you can do it, and you must take the actions necessary to achieve your goal.” —Suze Orman

Sure, there are lots of ways to get rich, but they all fall into one of these six categories as there are only six ways to actually get rich.

The six ways to get rich are:

  • Capitalize on a unique skill or talent.
  • Marry rich.
  • Inherit money.
  • Own a business.
  • Take calculated risks and get lucky.
  • Spend less than you earn and invest wisely.

Let’s explore each category.

CAPITALIZE ON TALENT

Don’t make money your goal. Instead, pursue the things you love doing and then do them so well that people can’t take their eyes off of you.” ― Maya Angelou.

Become an expert in one area or niche and exploit it. Dominate that field. And never stop growing.

If you read my post on Beyoncé, you will notice that she started young, developed her craft, and expanded her expertise. She not only sings, but dances, endorses products, started businesses, and writes songs. She owns what she does. Everything from trademarks – Blue Ivy and Ivy Park – to owning a music streaming service. Put it simply, she dominates in her field.

If you want to be the next J.K. Rowling or Stephen King, then you just have to start writing. J.K. Rowling famously said she was rejected at least 12 times before anyone would publish Harry Potter. Persistence and determination are vitally important if you want to succeed. And just FYI, it took her 7 years to write Harry Potter.

MARRY RICH

“Don’t you know that a man being rich is like a girl being pretty? You wouldn’t marry a girl just because she’s pretty, but my goodness, doesn’t it help?”

―Marilyn Monroe as Lorelei Lee in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes (1953)

Dating is all about introductions and proximity. It doesn’t matter if you swipe right on Tinder or meet at your family’s country club, you just have to get some face time. You can’t date who you can’t see or touch.

In my experience, men date and marry women who are in their vicinity or social circle. Therefore, if you are looking for a rich man, then you have to be where they are i.e., charity events, sports games, auction houses, doctoral seminars, or the like.

In addition, if you know where wealthy men tend to reside, then hey you can pack up and find a job there and frequent their haunts. Location, location, location baby.

People also tend to look for partners that are successful in their own right. You don’t necessarily have to be rich, but having some sort of talent or career outside of just being a wealthy mate’s plus one bodes well for you and your prospects of landing and keeping a partner. So, invest in yourself – get educated, cultured, learn opera, play piano, paint or learn another language – either way you have a skill.

Above all else, respect yourself. Have your own life, career, friends, family, and money. No one wants a loner that can barely make rent, they want someone who is open to people, new experiences, and can pick up the check.

Don’t agree. Well, how’s this for food for thought; Chrissy Teigen once responded to a mean tweet by telling someone she does not just spend someone else’s money, but in two words replied: “my money.” She also went on to note her Forbes ranking and that she is a best-selling cookbook author. She basically told people to chew on that – no pun intended. A very nice retort on her part and her equivalent of put that in your pipe and smoke it.

Ah, gotta love that Chrissy.

You have to admit it sure sounds better when you can list your own accomplishments.  Respect for self is attractive and shows confidence. And confidence is key.

INHERIT MONEY

I would rather make my name than inherit it. – William Makepeace Thackeray

Studies into the wealth of households have shown that most wealth today is now earned than inherited. In my experience, people truly appreciate and cherish that which they work and sweat for.

For example, when I was given gifts of money or other items I am usually losing or unable to tell you whom gave me the gift. The car in my driveway that I worked so hard for is still there 15 years later.

There are those that inherit their fortunes, but the saying goes that a fool and his money are soon parted. I suggest you get a career, get educated, and learn a craft to earn your own living. If you do inherit, then you can manage your money instead of squandering it.

OWN A BUSINESS

Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me. – Carol Burnett

Starting a business is what two-thirds of millionaires do. This lets you know that if you are successful and become rich, then most likely you will or do own a business at some point in your life.

I suggest determining what you are good at and then turning that into a business. Passion is great, but just because you are passionate about golf and want to be a pro golfer does not mean that is what you are good at or meant to do.

Also study up and get a mentor or work with people in the field you want to be in. Read books, attend seminars and save money. All businesses need capitol. If you can find a business to start with a low barrier to entry such as a food truck or blogging, then the better.

BIG RISKS FOR BIG REWARDS

“If you want big rewards, you gotta take big risks.” Jessica Biel as Tenley Parrish in Summer Catch (2001)

If you read my post, wealth comes from doing not luck, then you understand that from preparedness comes opportunity and hard work creates luck and success.

It is okay to take risks, but I prefer calculated ones. The ones where you do your research, study your results, learn from you’re mistakes or the ones of others and keep moving forward. Make that pro con list, watch videos, attend conferences or better yet, speak to those that have done or are doing what you long to do. If you’re going to risk it all, then best to know all the facts first.

SPEND LESS, SAVE AND INVEST OVER TIME

The formula for getting rich is this: spend < money earned

Simply put, spend less than you earn.

If you can do that, you have got a shot at getting rich.

For example, you can be a millionaire over time if you do the following:

  • Save $6,000 a month for 10 years getting a 6% return
  • Save $2,200 a month for 20 years getting a 6% return
  • Save $800 a month for 25 years getting an 8% return
  • Save $600 a month for 30 years getting an 8% return
  • Save $500 a month for 40 years getting a 6% return

The combinations can vary based on the amount of savings invested and the return on investment of compound interest. However, the bottom line is saving can earn you a fortune.

For those concerned with inflation, here is an inflation-adjusted. 25-year wealth accumulation chart.

Source: www.businessinsider.com

THE BOTTOM LINE

Ultimately, no matter what path you take if you partake in spending less than you earn and investing, over time you will become rich eventually.