Testing…1, 2, 3. Can you hear me out there? You listening? Good. Ah yes, I remember it like it was yesterday.
One of the FIRE (Financial Independence, Retire Early) Bloggers that I had been reading was featured in Forbes. I remember thinking how did he do that. Well, when you go from $0 to $400,000 in seven years that does tend to get people’s attention.
The thing that really stood out to me was that he actually got to $400,000. I just knew if he could get there, then he could get to $1 million.
That blog was called Budgets are Sexy.
I had the pleasure to not only meet J. Money, or J$ for short, in-person just a few years after that article, but also got to interview him on this blog. He’s one of the most coolest and down-to-earth finance dudes you will ever meet.
Over the years, he has given his advice on how he basically went from nothing to something.
He regularly talks about his net worth on his blog and does not shy away from telling you about the highs and the lows of building wealth.
His transparency is why people gravitate towards him. He tells it like it is. He walks it like he talks it.
One of the best pieces of advice he gave me on the road to $1 million was to max out your retirement accounts. All of them. And if you can’t do that, then save as much as you can.
What J$ didn’t know is that his blog lit a spark for me.
If he started with nothing and could go to almost half a million dollars, then I could too.
We like to call J. Money the Godfather of FIRE blogging because he started back when it was just a small niche in 2008. There is even a joke on his site where he is called the Miley Cyrus of Finance! Ha!
All jokes aside, I was paying attention. Budgets are Sexy is the personal finance blog in which it is Greenback’s Magnet yardstick for building wealth. Like Visa, his blog is everywhere my blog wants to be.
Therefore, after reading that Forbes article, I decided at that moment that I wanted to get to $400,000 too!
So I put my head down and went to work. At one point, I was investing 25 percent of my income. I lived off rice and kale. No avocado toast for me. I wanted that sweet taste of freedom.
Every spare dime was put to work in my brokerage account.
This blog is also how I keep myself accountable to reach my financial goals. It didn’t matter if I had holes in my shoes, I kept walking in then until they literally fell apart. Nothing went to waste. I was reading 10 to 20 books on personal finance a year.
I paid off my car $450 payment in 2009. Then my personal loan that was costing me $333 a month. All the hard work and sacrifices paid off when I saw that my balance had grown from $50,000 to $375,000. Then within a few months, I was at over $402,000!
It also got picked up by some other sites like Yahoo and AOL.com.
I am still increasing my annual contributions every year. I won’t stop until I reach my target: $1 million dollars!
The one crazy thing I noticed in the comments section is that there were many folks saying that $1 million will not be enough to retire.
I couldn’t believe what I was reading. I simply was sharing how I set a goal and was working on reaching it. Man, that really knocked me over. Nevertheless, I recovered quickly. You have to have thick skin once you decide to put your name or work out there.
Unlike George McFly, I can handle rejection. The point of the story was to help and inspire not to hurt and discourage.
I felt like 50 Cent on that interview he recently did on the Million Dollaz Worth of Game podcast where he says his first record deal with Shady Aftermath netted him $1 million and Dame Dash says that ain’t no money. Huh? When you go from nothing to $1 million, you bet your a$$ that is a sh*t ton of money.
50 Cent says Dame Dash has no money now and calls Dame Dash out for telling him that the $1 million he received from signing with Eminem's Shady Records was no money.
However, I digress. I just put my head down and went back to work.
No wonder people practice stealth wealth! Regardless of all the naysayers, I am still working toward my goal. Next stop on the million-dollar tour is $500,000. After that, it is $750,000. And of course, $1 million.
If being on Business Insider taught me anything, it’s not to let anything or anyone trip you up on the road to your dreams. It’s great to be acknowledged and to talk about your goals, but it’s even better to actually live out your dreams.
The most sophisticated people I know – inside they are all
children. – Jim Henson
If you ever saw the film Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory, then you know how much people love chocolate. And it can be a goldmine business or chocolate mine depending on how you look at it. 😉 People were losing their minds to get that golden ticket.
Chocolate Mania had swept the nation! 😂
It was pure marketing genius. They even commented on that in
the film. Wonka was making a mint selling those chocolate bars. It’s all about
marketing folks!
It’s sort of like Patron. They don’t have the best tequila;
they just have the best marketing. Get that money.
Just look at all the money the candy business makes! Billions!
Here are some of the top chocolate companies in the world.
They may have even helped spread the let’s have candy at every event or holiday cheer. If not, I am sure they somehow found a way to cultivate and capitalize on Halloween and even Christmas.
Who says you need a box of chocolate on Valentines?!!! Most people don’t even eat most of it. That box of chocolates is still bought and paid for!
If you ever saw the film Legally Blond, you actually saw her do what most do with a box of variously filled chocolates. That’s right. She took a bite and put it BACK in the box!
Reese Witherspoon in Legally Blond
Mondelez International Inc. even tried to cash in on this
love of chocolate. However, they have officially abandoned its pursuit of
Hershey Co., which would have created the biggest confectionery conglomerate in
the world.
Now that you have some background on the business of
chocolate, let’s get down to money affairs.
Back in 1990, the movie, The Witches, based on the 1983 children’s novel of the same title by Roald Dahl, was released in theaters. The movie premiered on 25 May 1990, in London and was scheduled to open the same day in the United States, but was delayed until August.
Sadly, it would be Muppet and Fraggle Rock creator, Jim Henson’s last film.
As in the original novel, the story features evil witches who masquerade as ordinary women and hurt children. However, a boy and his grandmother need to find a way to foil and destroy them.
The witches decide they will open up, get this, chocolate
shops to lure poor unsuspecting children.
This is where the story begins.
GUARDIANS OF THE MILKY WAY GALAXY
While on vacation in Norway, eight-year-old American boy
Luke Eveshim is warned about the witches, female demons with a boundless hatred
for children and various methods of destroying or transforming them.
Helga, Luke’s Grandmother, becomes his legal guardian after
the passing of his parents. They move to England. His grandmother is advised to
take a vacation for a summer by the sea for fresh air after discovering she has
diabetes.
Also staying at the hotel are a convention of witches, masquerading as the Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children, with the Grand High Witch, the all-powerful leader of the world’s witches, attending their annual meeting under the name Eva Ernst (played by Academy Award Winner Angelica Houston).
Really? They have some nerve naming their coven the
Prevention of Cruelty to children. Hiding in plain sight like that, but open to
interpretation. Yes, indeed.
Let us examine the fact that Luke had a grandmother that not
only decided to raise him, but has the financial means to take a vacation by
the sea.
I have it on good authority that if you try to rent a house
on Virginia Beach for a week it can set you back $5,000!
I wouldn’t mind paying that if I had investments like
interest earned from stocks or royalties to pay for it.
If you have $25,000, you could earn over 2 percent in a high
yield savings account. That’s the ish I’m talking about right there. Making
money for breathing. That is the equivalent of doing a part-time gig and
earning $500 a year.
I find the idea of earning money just for having a pulse so sexy. I find that It’s like Beyoncé says in her song Rocket. Shhh. Just listen. To the words. Hell yeah, you the sh*t That’s why you’re my equivalent So sexy! Haha
Inside a ballroom where the witches hold their meeting, Luke
spies upon them as the Grand High Witch unveils her latest creation: a magic
potion to turn children into mice, which they will use on confectionery
products in sweet shops and candy stores to be opened using money provided by
her.
They know how to make their vision a reality.
You have to chart a course and follow that path to where you want to go. What path? You just point to the top and go! That’s what I learned from Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson 😉
I have also learned that when you own something to hold onto
it.
It doesn’t matter of it is a taco stand, food truck, or blog. If you own 100%, then it’s yours to do with as you wish. Hold on to as much equity and ownership in your company as possible. I learned that from Shark Tank’s Daymond John. Like McDonald’s does to its hamburgers, keep grinding.
And try to be cash heavy. Meaning stay away from debt. I learned that from Warren Buffet. 😉 They say his company Berkshire Hathaway aims to keep $1 billion or more in cash to snap up businesses and be able to make quick decisions when buying stocks.
In addition, they say Apple does the same. The world’s first
EVER $1 trillion-dollar company keeps billions in cash.
Therefore, you should do the same and follow in their example. ALWAYS have cash reserves. NO EXCUSES!!!
Like Mr. Money Mustache once said, “Salads and barbells every day, no goddamned excuses!!!”
WE ALL WANT TO BE ROYALS
And I don’t mean Prince William and Kate Middleton.
I mean getting royalty checks in the mail.
I saw an article in which Don McLean owns only 2 stocks:
Google and Amazon.
I also recently read that Don McLean continues to receive
royalties off his music he wrote almost 50 years ago. Yes, this artist still
makes $300,000 per year from something he created in 1971.
In the article by Sovereign Man, it retells McLean’s story.
Early spring in 1971 when an obscure American folk singer
wrote a song that would change his life forever.
Sitting at a café in Saratoga Springs, New York, Don McLean
scribbled the lyrics to a long ballad about an experience he had as a
13-year-old boy.
It began with a radio bulletin that said that Buddy Holly
had died in a plane crash. In 1959, when this happened they called it the day
the music died. The boy was crushed. But the man used this emotion to write a
song that would take the world by storm.
Of course, that song was “American Pie.”
It stayed atop the Billboard music charts for more than a
year. And it turned this once obscure folk singer into a global sensation.
Ah yes, the power of the pen.
More than that – McLean was immediately set for life: he
still makes more than $300,000 a year from that song.
Imagine getting paid hundreds of thousands of dollars a year
for something you did in 1971!
That is what stocks can do for you! That is why we must
invest. Unless you can write the next hit song for Beyoncé, you must invest in
the stock market to make money on your money. You already earned it and now
your money works for you and this is your equivalent to getting royalties.
This story holds the key to one of the greatest business
models ever invented: the idea that you can create something once and get paid
on it for life.
“The idea is not to live forever, it is to create
something that will.” – Andy Warhol
It’s the royalty business. That’s right. I did the work like
20 years ago. Now cut the check!
In case you’re not familiar with the term, a royalty is a
cash payment that you receive over and over again from an asset that you created,
developed, or own.
For example, songwriters collect a royalty every time a song
they write is played, purchased, downloaded or streamed. Some more than others.
That is why Taylor Swift was mad at Apple iTunes for giving away artists music, such as herself, for free for three months!
That’s why McLean still makes money from American Pie. You
have to pay to play. Music that is. In this case anyway.
Royalties are also common in natural resources. Royalty companies
often provide financing to oil and mining companies… and those borrowers pay a
royalty on every ounce of gold or gallon of oil that the land produces.
Authors earn a royalty every time somebody buys their book. Inventors receive royalties from their patents. Why do you think Beyoncé trademarked Blue Ivy, Taylor Swift trademarked Swiftmas, and Cardi B is trying to trademark OKrrrrrrr?!!!
The powerful cashflow of this model can be incredibly
appealing to investors, and there are even some companies that specialize in
acquiring assets that produce royalty income.
Therefore, if you are good at something, don’t give it away
for free.
Even though I am a HUGE Marvel comics fan, I actually got
the last comment mentioned above from DC Comics The Joker. 😉
It’s still true though. You have to admit.
If I could, I would tap dance on Twitter, if they paid me.
Me and my lipstick confessions charge a premium for the
really good stuff.
I would hand draw or smack lipstick stickers 💋on Kylie Jenner’s lip kits if she paid me $400.
Joan Rivers wrote jokes for days. She once said jokingly, that she would, “write for Hitler for $500.”
Boys tell stories ’bout the man. Say I never struggled, wasn’t hungry, yeah, I doubt it – Drake, Started From The Bottom
So, who is the man behind the mohawk?
Well, you’re about to find out.
Just who he is.
But first…
A shout out to all things hearts and flowers. Valentine’s Day is coming!
Valentine’s Day!!!
Dean: Where am I going? Sam: Dean, it’s Valentine Day. Your favorite holiday, remember? I mean, what do you always call it – uh, Unattached Drifter Christmas?😂
Q: What did cavemen give their wives on Valentine’s Day? A: Lots of ughs and kisses.
Always blows me away finding pencils on the ground… Seemingly so worthless, yet can cause so much damage or love depending on who picks it up and how they use it. pic.twitter.com/TB5m7wX7yz
Q: What did the calculator say to the pencil on Valentine’s Day? A: You can always count on me.
Okay. All jokes and kidding aside.
Who are we talking with today about the sorted topic of coin? Blogger extraordinaire J. Money of Budgets Are Sexy
Sometimes I am two people. Johnny is the nice one. Cash causes all the trouble. They fight. – Johnny Cash
Let’s find out the man behind the money and the mohawk?
Let’s not waste any time. We’re diving right into the interview.
THE INTRODUCTION
GBM Miriam: It was great meeting the one and only J. Money at FinCon 18 in Orlando. Congrats, on being an 11-time Plutus Award winner for your blog Budgets are Sexy. You can see more about what others are saying about his blog on his press page. The accolades are well-deserved. I even included him on my list of Money advice that 10 Bloggers told me blog post! That’s because J$ does not hold anything back when it comes to talking money.
Imagine my surprise to meet the man I had been following along to and reading his stuff for the past several years.
He was extremely nice and down-to-earth. One of the friendliest guys I have ever met!!!
He never ceases to amaze me with his sheer enthusiasm for life, unbridled passion for what he does, his unmatched love of talking all things money, and incredible charisma and good vibes is almost like nothing I have ever felt!
It was so great to meet him. He is just awesome to be around. You can never feel bad around J$. I dare you. He’s just too friendly and cool.
I had to reach out and ask for an interview.
MEET J. MONEY (J$ FOR SHORT 😉
This is how it feels to meet J$.
Fun Fact: Both Carl Weathers and Schwarzenegger have starred in films with Sly Stallone. Carl Weathers had famously done Rocky just a few years before he did this film, Predator, with Ah-nuld!
For those who don’t already know the award winning blogger.
Like Jay Z said, “allow me to re-introduce myself.”
J$ STARTS A SEXY BLOG
1. What prompted you to start a blog about money? Why are budgets sexy?
I fell in love with
the community after searching for tips back in 2007 when I bought a house with
no money down and no budget whatsoever (*gasp*). I was entranced by how real
and RAW people were online – especially those sharing their net worths! – and
after a while I thought I’d jump into the ring myself and have a little fun…
Had no idea it would completely change my life, and my finances, over a decade
later!
I came up with the “budgets are sexy” concept around the time Justin Timberlake’s “I’m bringing sexy back” song was charting, and thought it went well together since budgets essentially gives you the one thing that we all strive for – confidence. The confidence to know where your money’s been, the confidence to know where you’re money’s going, and then of course the confidence it gives you within just knowing you’re on top of the game! And how sexy is that??
So, you just decided to toss your hat into the ring! Wow. That’s it. Just jump out there. Well, that’s awesome.
You only live once, that’s the motto…YOLO – Drake, The Motto
I guess you really did take YOLO to heart. ❤👍
Well, alright! 👌
GBM Miriam: I read the Financial Diet by Chelsea Fagen and was pleasantly surprised to see you were featured in it!! Congrats!!!
2. Any favorite
finance books? How come?
My top 3 favorites are:
“I Will Teach You To Be Rich” by
Ramit Sethi (good for action taking and funny as hell)
“The Automatic Millionaire” by David
Bach (also good for action taking)
“The Millionaire Next Door” by
Thomas J. Stanley and and William D. Danko. (good for your *mind!*)
I also love “Essentialism” by Greg McKeown, which isn’t a finance book, but more of a lifestyle/career one which heavily influences what I spend my time on, and more importantly – what I don’t.
GBM Miriam: On your blog it states: “A personal finance blog that won’t put you to sleep.” – Benjamin Franklin
Great! Because I liked to be entertained. I don’t want to be put to sleep! I want to talk money and have some fun. They say, give the people what they want.
I thought that quote on Franklin was pretty funny because I did a blog post on the how the 13 virtues of Benjamin Franklin can make you rich. I am a huge fan of his and that is why I like the Disney film National Treasure so much as it has B. Franklin all over it!
Are you a fan of Ben Franklin?
3. What are you
reading right now? What’s on your night stand?
I’m reading a lot of books on the history of my hometown, which I’m told is even more boring than finances 😉 There’s also a book on Benjamin Franklin that a reader mailed me – “Franklin’s Thrift: The Lost History of an American Virtue” – as he knew I’m a big fan of his habits.
Success is having to worry about every damn thing in the world, except money. – Johnny Cash
4. One thing people
may not know about you?
I have mild O.C.D. as
well as A.D.H.D., and I also hate public speaking… which sucks, because you
could really grow an empire in this field if you love getting in front of a
crowd! Here’s an awesome article I just came across btw for anyone else who
suffers from “reading O.C.D.” (It’s a thing!) –> How I Overcame My Reading OCD
Started from the bottom, now we’re here. – Drake
GBM Miriam: I read online that you managed to amass $400,000 in 7 years. That’s no small feat.
I try to think positive. Write down my goals (cause you know, it’s all about the power of the pen). Visualize what I want and say my affirmations to make things come to fruition.
But what about you? How’d you do it?
5. What’s in your wallet? How did you start building wealth?
I’m super minimalist
with my wallet (it’s actually a money clip), and I only keep a credit card in
it, my debit card, and then cold hard cash along with my drivers license.
Although now I realize your question is more about my proverbial wallet
isn’t it? Haha…
For that I max out all my retirement accounts every year using Vanguard index funds, or more specifically – the VTSAX fund (I keep my investing simple too!). Went from $50,000 to $800,000+ by mainly doing that, along with of course cutting back and finding other avenues of income along the way…
GBM Miriam: I appreciate that honesty right there. Thanks for keeping it 💯!!
You just put it out there. And that’s awesome. I need all the transparency I can get right now with the Dow Jones base jumping every other week.
I almost started to Birdbox myself like Sandra Bullock and only look at the stock market blindfolded, but then I thought to just go ahead and look at it, as it’s better to just rip a band-aid off.
Alright, it’s time for the bonus round.
My favorite part of every interview here on Greenbacks Magnet!!!
Bonus Questions (pick
any of the questions from the top or below that you want to answer)
7. What’s your
favorite ’80s and/or ’90s jam? What’s on your ipod? Would you let us hook
up your ‘Recently Played’ list on Spotify to our office speakers?
Haha… I love old school rap, mixed in with a little pop and folk music for good measure. You could hook up my iPod Nano if you wanted (remember that one???) but it’s stuck in the 2000’s as I rarely download anything and tend to stick to the radio or vinyl… I love me some Johnny Cash or Chuck Berry action!
Chuck Berry huh? Anyone remember the film Back to the Future?
Well, here is Marty doing a cover of the 1958 Chuck Berry song Johnny B. Goode. Enjoy!
8. What would
your autobiography be called?
“Normal Guy Gets Lucky and Can’t Believe He Writes Down His Thoughts For a Living”
GBM Miriam: I love that title! That’s really funny, but sooooo accurate.
9. If you found a lottery ticket that ends up winning $2 million. What would you do?
Pay the taxes on it, spend $10,000 lavishly on friends and family, and then probably bank the rest into Vanguard funds and keep going about my business…
GBM Miriam: Smart move. Pay those taxes.
In a weird way I actually DON’T wanna win the lottery as I want to see if I can hit financial freedom *on my own*. Not that I’d turn it down if I won, but I’d probably have to stop blogging since everyone would just assume it was the lottery that brought me to this place and write me off, haha… I already feel like I won the lottery anyways as you can tell from my autobiography! 😉
If you notice we go from 9 to 12, that is because out of 15 (more or less) interview questions, all guests can answer whatever ones interest them the most. Skipping a few questions we move right along.
In the illustrious words of Pauly Shore, “let’s keep on cruisin’.”
12. Do you consider Monopoly to be a game that you play with friends or enemies?
FRIENDS!! Why would
you play it with enemies??? The only real problem with Monopoly is finding
people who will actually *finish the game* with you since everyone bails after
only like 30 mins!! The worst!!
13. If you could steal credit for any great piece of art, song, film, book etc which one would you claim?
GBM Miriam: Personally, I would want the Campbell Soup Cans by Andy Warhol.
Painted around 1962, one painting (of the 32 cans he painted, which the canvases are on display at the Modern Museum of Art in New York) went on to fetch a record-breaking amount for an American artist of $11.8 at Christie’s auction house in May 2006. I do love some Campbell’s chicken noodle soup.
Andy Warhol also said, “the goal isn’t to live forever. It is to create something that does.” It is one of the reasons I chose to start a blog.
BAS J$: I’m gonna take the lame way out and say I wouldn’t steal anyone’s as I hate it when my stuff gets copped. Plus — I already suffer from Impostor Syndrome just being *myself*, so there’s no way I could pull off being someone else even if I wanted to! 🙂
14. Which animal would make the best type of president if the animal kingdom ever rises up and takes over?
Unicorns? I don’t know anyone who hates them, and we sure do need some magic up in here to fix our world!! 🦄🦄🦄
Unicorn!!!!!
15. When it comes to making tea which answer most applies to you?
a) I am the patron
saint of tea, tea for everyone!
b) I’m not a one man
Starbucks. Every man for himself.
c) I’ve only got two hands- so first come, first served.
GBM Miriam: As there was only three options, J. Money decided to do a write in answer. As any boss would.
What I should have asked. And figured would be a coffee drinker’s answer.
Well, that brings us to the end of this interview. This was a fun post and I hope a good time was had by all.
GBM Miriam: Thank you J. Money for stopping by!! I am sure we will see each other again at the next money meets media conference as FinCon19 is coming to DC! That’s right in our neck of the woods. 😉
BAS J$: thanks again for having me! fun and creative questions 👍🙏
Want more straight forward money advice from Budgets Are Sexy?
Til Debt Do Us Part is a Canadian television series that follows couples that are going through financial crisis and financial expert, Gail Vaz-Oxlade, comes in to help the couple find solutions.
The series ran for over 100 episodes from 2005-2011. It also had a spin-off called Princess. She teaches couples to go from red to black and gain control over their money.
The show would air right after the Suze Orman show during its run on CNBC. Read my post Dom Perignon Taste on a Budweiser Budget to see how it all went down on Suze’s show.
#1 REASON COUPLES BREAK UP
Money is the number #1 reason couples break up. She visits couples weekly and gives them challenges to help with their finances. Then at the end of each episode, after about 4 weeks, she awards the couple with up to $5,000 dollars to help them get out of debt.
CUT THE CHEQUE
By far the best part of the show, in my opinion, is when at the end of one month, Gail Vaz-Oxlade gives the couple a cheque for an amount up to $5,000, depending on their attitudes and how well they did during the challenges. Keep in mind, couples could get less and some have. One of the lowest amounts I have seen her give was $3,000, which is a 40% reduction of the prize money.
The show was so popular that a 52-Week Life Planner was released based on the television series and offers day-by-day, step-by-step strategies and tips for successfully managing household finances.
This reminds me of a Tom Holland interview he did for Spiderman talking about how Anthony Mackie always says, “cut the check.”
If you have never heard of the show Til Debt or can’t remember it, no worries, I will take you back down memory lane tonight.
WHO IS GAIL VAZ-OXLADE?
“We feel good when our homes are bright and shiny, put a little elbow grease into your money and it’ll glisten too.” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade
Gail Vaz-Oxlade is a financial writer and was a columnist for numerous publications as a freelancer including Yahoo! Canada Finance. She has helped people from high finance to low-income solve their money problems. Eventually, she became a television personality due to all of her work in finance and that is how the show Til Debt came into existence with her as the host.
She has written numerous books on the topic of finance. I have actually read one of her books called Debt-Free Forever.
Gail has a no-nonsense attitude when it comes to money. And that is what makes her so good at what she does.
FOR THE LOVE OF JARS
“You can have everything you want. All you need is a plan. And how do we spell plan? B-U-D-G-E-T!” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade
Watching the show was very interesting. One recurring theme was the jars. Gail advocated for couples to live on cash.
Every single episode, you got cash jars. You would put in a certain dollar amount. When you spend, you write it down in the budget binder cause cash slips through our fingers easier than that snail did with Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.
Some couples were taking out cash at the ATM from their bank accounts or doing cash advances, which Gail said she could not track so we don’t know where the money went. When it’s gone, it’s gone. Without writing it down or keeping receipts, there is no other way to track cash. So, jars it is.
MONEY LESSONS FOR GAIL
Gai loves cash and hates banks. She thinks they are bleeding people dry slowly with their interest and fees. Gail says banks are wolves in sheep’s clothing. The only way this will change is to teach financial literacy in school. I say start in elementary when they are old enough to start asking for a $1 lollipop, it’s time to start the finance lessons.
This is the secret recipe to building wealth: You need to make more money and you need to spend less money.
Here are 3 lessons that Gail taught me: (1) both partners need to manage the money, (2) no retail therapy, and (3) debt repayment takes time.
LESSON ONE: GAIL ON COUPLES MANAGING MONEY
Do not have only one partner manage the finances.
“It’s not unusual for one person to assume the nitty-gritty of daily finances…. The problem is that when one person is excluded, or totally abdicates responsibility, it means the other can mess things up with no monitoring or grow resentful at always having to do the detail…. Taking turns managing the chequebook, and having regular conversations so that both of you are clear about what’s going on, means you’re both in the know and working to the same ends. It also means that one person doesn’t have to deal with all the crap, while the other merrily laughs off the stress and frustration with, ‘You’re managing the money, so this is your problem to deal with.’ (Yes, there are dopes who say this.)”
Always know what is happening with your money. I don’t care who signs the check and put it in the envelope. Just make sure you lick the stamp. Be involved. Ask questions. Don’t be in the dark.
It’s kind of like that scene in Charmed in the episode Be Careful What You Witch For. Remember that scene in the beginning, after the opening credits. I want you to be skeptical like Phoebe. Always know who you owe and how much. Nothing is for free.
The conversation went like this:
Phoebe: I don’t get it you’ve been stuck in that bottle for two hundred years then someone finally sends you to us and you’ve no idea who licked the stamp? I find that very hard to believe.
Genie:What? I don’t get it you win the lotto and you’re asking for explanations?
Piper:Actually we’d like to know who to send the thank you note to.
“Plastic is anesthetic — it dulls the pain, and then what happens is you just keep waiting for the next fake high.”
And don’t I know it. I had a huge shopping problem for years. It was done as a way to dull the pain of the things going on around me – low-income, working full-time, going to college – I was a mess!
I had some pretty terrible managers when I was younger too. All the stress was getting to me. I had to find a way to cope, but shopping was not it. As I got more mature, I found ways to de-stress that were cheaper or free.
I have said it before that credit is seductive and addictive. It should not be used to replace your emergency fund (liquid cash). However, if you do, be strategic and use credit wisely and sparingly.
“A goal without a deadline is just a dream.” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade
Slow and steady is the way to repay debt.
“One step at a time. You are on your way. Expect challenges. Keep your goal where you can see it.”
You better believe it. If it took you 8 years to accumulate the debt, thinking you can pay it off in 3 months is delusional. See my post Getting out of debt one step at a time.
The good news is that once you recognize you have a problem with debt, then you can work on solutions. I have noticed that generally 2-3 years of cutting back and attacking debt is usually enough time to pay off most if not all of your consumer debt except the mortgage and student loans. After 5-7 years, the only debt left is usually the mortgage. That is a small price to pay for freedom.
Money can’t buy you love. But keeping love alive without money can be pretty tough. In fact, ninety percent of marriage breakups are due to money problems. And to get advice on how to manage money usually costs money! Til Debt Do Us Part, is a series that offers tough-love solutions to those willing to face their financial troubles head on. In each episode we meet a couple in crisis. Some are on the verge of bankruptcy, hounded by creditors or facing eviction. Others are just getting by, but in the midst of a personal meltdown or relationship breakdown because of money issues. With the sensitivity of a therapist and the toughness of a CFO, our host, renowned financial author and columnist, Gail Vaz-Oxlade reveals what she’s found in a couple’s finances – and then she’ll dig a little deeper. She asks some tough questions and then they’ll be forced to face reality. Where will it end if they continue on this rocky road? To get things back on track, Gail takes control of their finances …
This show was very eye-opening in how people managed their finances. Many did not have a clue what was coming in and going out. Gail would come in with her screen shots of the couples bank accounts and spending and give it to them straight.
Many times the wives would burst out in tears after seeing how much debt the family was actually in. Lots of couples were in over their heads. Some so deep in debt they had to consider selling their house, or worse, bankruptcy!
Some couples did not want to make any changes. Even though they were debt up to their eyeballs. These people needed to get their priorities straight. Much like Hermione, in Harry Potter.
Here is the show’s Intro and theme song along with a promo. This is just a taste, a light sampling, of what you are in store for with this show.
There are 2 episodes that stand out for me. They were called The Worst Family Ever and Love Affair with Luxury.
MONEY WORRIES CAN CAUSE SLEEPLESS NIGHTS
In the S03E13 entitled, “The worst family ever?” One couple were living in the wife’s family basement for about a couple of years. They spent with reckless abandon. Oh, the couple popped bottles night and day. Especially, after moving out and buying their own home for about $225,000. That’s not bad. What is bad is that they saved zero dollars while sponging off her parents.
Then, to make matters worse, they threw non-stop parties at their house for friends and family. This was obviously all to make themselves look good to friends and family. In Yoda speak, so concerned with appearances they are.
“Happy people don’t worry about what other people think about them.” – Gail Vaz-Oxlade
OUT OF CONTROL SHOPPING FOR BABY BUT THE KIDS ARE ALRIGHT
In addition, they expanded their family and had a son, but financially were unprepared for this. At one point, the wife was spending $1200 a month outfitting junior! I couldn’t believe it. What is she buying Versace onesies? Get real. A baby doesn’t care. They just want to be warm, feed, and dry.
This couple were overspending by the tune of $4,100 a month! Holy spending gone bonkers, Batman!
Fun Fact: For those of you unfamiliar with that Batman line, here is where it comes from. The Batman television series from the 1960’s. Batman was American live action television series, based on the DC comic book. It starred Adam West as the titular character and hero Batman and Burt Ward as his sidekick Robin.
It was also turned into a cartoon series. Here is Robin at his finest with his sayings. Hilarious!
I decided to post it so you won’t ever have to get the tongue lashing that Penny got from Sheldon on an episode of The Big Bang Theory about Batman at 2:48 into the video.
It was about The Lord of the Rings. Even Raj used a Holy Robin saying in there!
In this next video, Sheldon gives a fun fact to Raj. Now, you know where I get it from.
Now, back to the story.
The way the couple on the show were able to overspend like that, drumroll please…the credit cards!
When Gail comes along they are so bad she tells them they have to sell the house. They flat out said they could not sell the house. Even though they are on the path to $1.3 million in debt and possible bankruptcy! Gail, at one point in the show, tells them they are the worst couple she has had on the show and that she had a few sleepless nights worrying about how to help them out of this situation. Coming from Gail, that’s scary.
The way it went down, it reminded me of that scene in The Chipmunk Adventure, when Jeanette and Eleanor was telling the Arabian prince that Brittany spends money like a drunken sailor and Brittany got mad. Hilarious. I just so happened to find the footage of that particular scene and the movie on YouTube. Hope you have fun watching! No need to thank me. Like Dean Winchester says, “You’re Welcome.”
SHOULD YOU FINANCE A $100,000 CAR?
“Change brings challenges, learning, and a sense of New. Change is full of promise.”- Gail Vaz-Oxlade
In the S04E03 entitled, “Love Affair with Luxury,” which aired March 6, 2008, is the gold standard of delusions of grandeur when it comes to money management. The wife, Simone, is a champion shopper and a spendthrift who manages to make 53 shopping trips in a single month! That’s nuts. Even though she’s on maternity leave, a luxury car is next on her shopping list.
The only reason the couple is able to afford such luxuries is because they have each other’s incomes. The minute one person’s income is gone or reduced, i.e. disability or divorce, the whole house of cards comes tumbling down faster than the stock market has in the last 30 days.
Frank and Simone’s combined $110,000 annual income is currently curbed by Simone being on maternity leave. Simone is addicted to what she believes she needs to keep up appearances in every respect, which includes working out at the gym, and spending money on “stuff” for herself, such as clothes, getting beauty treatments of various kinds, and having a beautifully appointed house. A $125,000 new car is next on the list. Simone, however, states that she would never do anything that would place her family at risk. But Frank doesn’t realize he is just as guilty, spending money on his electronics, which includes six large television sets in their house of four people, including one infant. This spending has resulted in $55,000 in consumer debt so far. They constantly fight about money, something having to give if their marriage can overcome this issue. As such, Gail issues them challenges largely focusing on dealing with their root problem, namely their addiction to luxury, this focus which not only entails them doing the challenges, but understanding why she has issued these challenges.
At one point in the show she says, “we can finance $100,000 can’t we.” For a car no less! If you have ever read this blog, you know I can’t stand cars for the simple reason that they can keep you in debt forever. You could spend a couple hundred grand on cars in a lifetime. You know how much interest you could earn on $200,000! Here are just a few on my posts on my beef with car loans below.
Money is a tool we use in the present to create the reality we want in the future. Learning about finance is a good start. Practicing good money habits and teaching your kids to understand the concepts of money – budgeting, saving, and spending – you help create their reality.
So, I want to always stay in control of your…I will now end this post in the last words of the Til Debt Do Us Part theme song, money, money, money, money, money, money, moneyyyy!
