Have you ever heard of a hedge fund? If not, I will explain here for you.
A hedge fund is an investment pool with a limited partnership of investors that uses high risk methods, such as investing with borrowed money, in hopes of realizing large capital gains.
A simple hedge fund definition is: a hedge fund is an alternative investment that is designed to protect investment portfolios from market uncertainty, while generating positive returns in both up and down markets. Throughout time investors have looked for ways to maximize profits while minimizing risk.
Hedge funds got their name from investors in funds holding both long and short stocks, to make sure they made money despite market fluctuations (called “hedging”).
According to Jim Cramer’s thestreet.com, because of their nature, hedge funds are typically only open to qualified (read: well off) investors, although not exclusively.
Simply put, a hedge fund, like a hedgehog, has a narrow focus and does one thing really well, which is to make money no matter what. However, in life it is usually the person who has much knowledge, as Rory Gilmore of Gilmore Girls would always say, that tends to do better in life.
Knowing a lot about one thing (like a hedgehog) is great, but knowing a little about a lot of things (like a fox) can be even better.
Truth be told, I just want to collect my compound interest and dividends the same way Sonic the Hedgehog collects those rings.
Sonic, the protagonist, is an anthropomorphic blue hedgehog with supersonic speed. Typically, Sonic must stop antagonist Doctor Eggman’s plans for world domination, often helped by his friends, such as Tails, Amy, and Knuckles.
The game was released in 1991 and is still one of my favorite Sega Genesis games. Solving puzzles, saving his fellow animals, and the world is all part of Sonic’s charm.
The Greek poet Archilochus wrote, “the fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing.” So which are you? Are you the hedgehog or the fox when it comes to investing?
IT ALL COMES DOWN TO RISK How risky are you?
Do you dive right in or do you take calculated risks?
In my experience, you should know your limits and then stop right there. Especially, when it comes to your money.
If you cannot afford to lose more than $100, then that is your risk level. If you cannot lose more than $5, then that is your risk level.
Once you decide to cross that mark, then you are in uncharted territory my friend. You do not have to push yourself to the limits.
Unlike Archer, the world’s greatest spy, you do not have a private detective or any other type of agency that will bankroll or bail you out in case of an emergency.
You must provide your own safety net by hedging your bets and always having an emergency fund.
SAVING FOR A RAINY DAY OR A MONSOON, WHICHEVER COMES FIRST You must hope for the best, but prepare for the worst.
Remember prince charming or princess moneybags is not coming. You are ON YOUR OWN!
Once I learned this lesson, I took steps to change my financial life. First, I set a goal. Second, I wrote it down. Third, I executed. Lastly, I watched my bank balance go up. As will you, if you follow this plan.
You need to set a goal. Mine is $100,000 USD in savings. Then you must write it down, as a goal that is only in your head is a wish. Then you make a plan and get to action. Mine was setting a savings goal per year and went like this: Year 1: $600 saved Year 2: $1,200 saved Year 3: $3,500 saved Year 4: $13,333 saved Year 5: 14,000 saved Year 6: $15,000 saved Year 7: $17,000 saved Year 8: $18,000 saved Year 9: $20,000 saved Year 10: $25,000 saved
If you add these yearly amounts, you will see that by year 9 I will have saved $102,633.
My goal will have been met after almost a decade of diligent saving. You are no longer living paycheck-to-paycheck and can handle any emergency that comes your way.
SLY AS A FOX BUT THE FOCUS OF A HEDGEHOG I say why not take attributes from both.
Be agile and cunning when it comes to investing and staying away from actively managed funds in favor of passively managed index funds.
Your laser-like focus will be on index funds just as a hedgehog is good at that one thing, you will be at focusing on one index fund: VTSAX.
This fund is all inclusive as it holds the entire stock market in its hands. You will see that over time the price has gone up. Therefore, as an investor, you must play the long game. When stocks go down, you buy. Basically, whenever there is a recession. When they go up, you hold.
This is solid advice. I need you to listen. Please don’t go. DON’T HANG UP!!! WAIT!! BUT…BUT…
If you want to place your bet on this course of action, I will bet you the same amount as Eddie Murphy and Dan Aykroyd did in Trading Places, $1!!! As that is my risk level, in this instance.
I have never been much of a babysitter. Looking back, I think it all started with seeing the sensational film called Adventures in Babysitting.
The film was released in theaters on July 3, 1987. I remember consonantly watching this movie on cable in the 90’s while growing up. Adventures in Babysitting (also known as A Night on the Town in certain countries) is a 1987 American comedy film written by David Simkins, directed by Chris Columbus (in his directorial debut), and starring Elisabeth Shue, Maia Brewton, Keith Coogan, Anthony Rapp, Penelope Ann Miller, Bradley Whitford, and brief cameos by blues singer/guitarist Albert Collins and singer-songwriter Southside Johnny Lyon.
Tonight we will talk about 5 lessons from the film that has stuck with me.
Why do I love this movie so much?
The sheer adrenaline rush of one long night of misadventures, a Thor reference, and nonstop chaos are what good 80’s movies are all about!
So put down that tub of Haagen Dazs ice cream and slice of pizza because I am about to take you on the babysitting ride and night of your life!!
FINANCE LESSON ONE: DATE NIGHT ON A BUDGET
Ah yes, the proverbial date night is a time-honored tradition that starts in puberty and goes all the way through the ages and well into marriage.
The movie starts when seventeen-year-old Chris Parker (Elisabeth Shue from The Karate Kid) get a call from her boyfriend (Bradley Whitford) that he has to cancel their date on their anniversary. What type of guy cancels on a girl on their anniversary? You will have to watch the movie to find out. Sorry no spoilers for that part here.
Opening credits
Speaking of date night, please do not get suckered into thinking you must impress the person you are with by picking up your date in a $50,000 BMW convertible, taking her to an expensive restaurant and buying equally expensive flowers.
For the right guy, I would settle for movie and a pizza. Just a small tip: Frugal couples tend to be the happiest couples. 😉
Fun Fact: I got to meet the cast of The Karate Kid at AwesomeCon in DC this past April 2019. They were exactly as you would expect: Fabulous. Totally cool, easy to talk to, upbeat, and just decent human beings. I even got a photo taken with William Zabka and got Ralph Macchio to sign my photo of My Cousin Vinny! Are you sure about that 5 minutes?! 🤣
As sure as I am that this post has 5 lessons!!
Keep reading and find out! 😉
Instead of hanging out with her best friend Brenda (Penelope Ann Miller) her mother convinces her to babysit the Andersons’ daughter, 8-year-old Sara (Maia Brewton), while they attend a party in downtown Chicago.
To which Chris replies, “I’m too old to babysit.” Honey, you ain’t seen nothing yet! 🤣
This was the worst babysitting gig on the planet. But Chris pulled through like a champ. Let’s see if you can keep up with the plot details.
Chris is set to babysit Sara. Her older brother, Fifteen-year-old Brad Anderson (Keith Coogan), has a massive crush on Chris. His friend Daryl (Anthony Rapp) comes by carrying his dad’s Playboy with a woman in it that looks just like Chris. Her best friend Brenda, who ran away to the bus station downtown because she just can’t take it anymore at home, calls her frantically from inside a phone booth (which doubles as a homeless man’s home) to come pick her up from downtown. They are in a race against time to get downtown before Brad and Sara’s parents get back.
And did I mention that on the way they get a flat tire, get a ride from a one-hooked truck driver whose wife is cheating on him so he pulls a gun on the guy while they’re in the car. And a car thief steals the Cadillac they are hiding in while they are still in it! All this is happening while she needs to get her mom’s station wagon towed and fixed. Oops, I meant to say her mom’s car! 🤣
She says that line throughout the entire film with suck shock and dismay that I laugh every time!
Hi-jinks ensue when you are the babysitter in this tale. So if anyone every recommends babysitting to me as a side hustle, no thanks. I’ll pass.
FINANCE LESSON TWO: A FRIEND IN NEED
Once Chris gets that phone call from Brenda, that’s when all hell breaks loose!!!
Her mom’s car gets a flat, they are taken to a chop shop in a stolen car, escape from car thieves and then they enter a blues club where the band on stage won’t let them leave until they sing the blues.
Daryl starts talking t a streetwalker but that gets cut short as they are being chased by the car thieves because they know where they are located so they hop on the Chicago L train and get put into the middle of a gang fight. One of the best scenes of the movie happens right here. Don’t F#*k with the babysitter! 🤣
The list goes on and on. All the while Brenda is still stuck downtown having her own adventures.
Let’s start with the fact that Chris would not have had these issues had Brenda not chose to run away. This caused her mom’s car to get a flat on the freeway, her windshield to get shot out, and that would cost her $50 bucks!
They end up running into a fraternity party where Chris befriends a guy there played by actor George Newbern (voice of Ren in Pirates of Dark Water). Hearing of her plight he offers to donate $45 to her cause.
This is truly where the term a friend in need is a friend in deed applies. He decided to help her out with no hesitation and asked for nothing in return.
This is the part in the film where I’m like “Ferris Bueller you’re my hero!” 🤣
One of my favorite parts was when she said I will just use the money I have in my account to pay for everything, but when she looks at her checkbook she sees she doesn’t have enough.
So let this be a life lesson for you all out there; never leave home without cash and a credit card.
I learned this lesson from Arnold Schwarzenegger as he says he never leaves home without a credit card and at least $1,000 in cash just in case.
FINANCE LESSON THREE: A DAY LATE AND A $5 DOLLARS SHORT
Dan, the fraternity guy, drops the gang off at the garage.
She explains to the owner, a Thor look alike, much to the delight of Sara, she is $5 short. He refuses to give them the car until Sara offers up her Thor helmet as a peace offering and selfless gift. He then gives them their car.
There are times when despite our best efforts we come up short.
However, like in the song Izzo (H.O.V.A.), JayZ said, “Plus if they was short with cheese I would work with them.”
Sometime you just got to help a brother out! Or in this case, a babysitter.
FINANCE LESSON FOUR: DO WHAT YOU GOT TO DO
After getting the car back, Chris spots her boyfriend in a restaurant with another girl. The gang goes in and confronts him.
While the shenanigans with Mike ensues, Sara slips away and while looking at toys in a display window gets spotted by the car thieves.
Come on, Chris! You should have some sort of plan in case you and the kids get separated.
She then runs to her parents building and scales the side while trying to get away from the thieves. Chris goes after her by climbing down the side of the building herself. Talk about going the extra mile!
From personal experience, I know how hard it is out here. You have to make a dollar out of fifteen cents!
But I am here to tell you, “Dearly beloved, we have gathered here today To get through this thing called life” and if the elevator tries to bring you down GOcrazy!!! haha Thank you Prince for those inspiring words.
Because I thought Chris was insane for scaling a building, but hey, you do what you’ve got to do out here. Like Prince said in the song Let’s Go Crazy, “In this life, you’re on your own.”
In my own experience, I had to work at a gas station to pay the bills.
It didn’t matter if I had to scrub toilets, sell hot dogs, or sell home security systems door-to-door (yes I did that too), I did what I had to do to survive.
Wasn’t nothing going on but the rent and it’s due on the first!
You are too good for nothing when it comes to your family and finances.
You have to put food on the table.
Go get two jobs if you have too!!!
But you take care of your obligations.
My father always told me responsibilities first, fun later.
I also cold-called jobs to see about getting gigs.
That is how I ended up getting one selling cell phones. In addition, I met people that would end up becoming life long friends.
Doing what you have to do, rolling up your sleeves, and putting in the work always gets rewards.
FINANCE LESSON FIVE: A RACE AGAINST TIME
They get Sara and the kids retrieve Brenda from the bus station and rush home, narrowly avoiding the Andersons on Interstate 290.
And Chris has everything taken care of right before Sara and Brad’s parents walk through the door.
As Chris says goodnight to the kids, Brad tells her he understands about her not returning his crush and that if they see each other at school the next day, it’s okay if she ignores him. But Chris smiles and tells him she doesn’t ignore her friends. Damn straight!!
As Chris is leaving, Dan arrives with one of Sara’s missing skates. He says he needs a babysitter and is disappointed when Chris says she is retired; he confesses the babysitter was for him. Chris decides that retirement can wait and gladly agrees to babysit Dan. Sara was delighted to see here missing skate and tells Chris to reward him with a kiss. With Sara’s encouragement, Chris and Dan kiss outside as Brad closes the blinds giving them some privacy.
Inadvertently, Chris got that kiss she wanted in the beginning of the film as the song was saying in the opening credits, but from another man instead of that jerk she dated.
The last lesson of the night; focus on your retirement.
Much like Chris came out of babysitting retirement, you too must not call it quits until you have made sure everything you need and want is in place.
You are in a race against time my friends to get out of the rat race sooner rather than later and that can only happen if you plan ahead.
I used an online calculator and found that if you start at $0 and invest $8,500 for 30 years at an 8% return, you will have $1,039,939.88. That’s right, you will be a millionaire!
If you can save $20,000 a year, this includes an employer match as does the previous retirement example, you hit the seven-figure milestone in 20 years! You would be free to be you.
Now this is an adventure worth taking.
The retire early adventure.
Inputs Current Principal: $ 0.00 Annual Addition: $ 8,500.00 Years to grow: 30 Interest Rate: 8% Compound interest 1 time(s) annually Make additions at start end of each compounding period
